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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28586274">conflicted people and the blaze of the sun</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/pecanny/pseuds/pecanny'>pecanny</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Toby Smith | Tubbo Needs a Hug, TommyInnit Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), also VERY slight nod to traitor punz, man.... they are just Children, niki and puffy are there but just as mentions</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:01:16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,362</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28586274</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/pecanny/pseuds/pecanny</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy and Tubbo have some things to talk out. Maybe not enough time for everything, but they try.</p><p> </p><p>(title stolen from connor's quote on tommy's stream today: "at the end of the day, you’re just a conflicted person, not a bad person. and i hope you find what you’re looking for.")</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Toby Smith | Tubbo &amp; TommyInnit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>81</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>conflicted people and the blaze of the sun</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The sun shone high in the sky on what Tubbo silently considered to be, well, Doomsday. The weather was ironic, he mused, as what was weeks of dark clouds looming over L’manberg finally cleared this morning into a blinding blue sky. Earlier, Tubbo woke up right at dusk to watch the sun’s rays slowly rise over his country, and wondered if he would be lucky enough to see the sunrise tomorrow.  </p><p> </p><p>Now, Tubbo sighed as he slipped on his netherite boots, scanning his people who were all gathered in L’manburgs’ main plaza. Fundy and Punz were speaking in low, hushed tones as they buffed their swords, Fundy’s tail swishing in apprehension while Punz’s downcast eyes held an emotion Tubbo couldn’t place. The faint sound of swords clashing rung in Tubbo’s ears as Niki and Puffy practiced sparring in the outskirts, and Tommy wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Tubbo lightly tapped on Fundy’s shoulder and jumped when the fox hybrid quickly whipped his head to face him, unguarded fear in his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“Er, hey Fundy. Have you seen Tommy around?” Tubbo questioned awkwardly. He knew everyone was on edge, but his need to see Tommy outshined any anxiety he’d feel in breaking the heavy atmosphere. </p><p> </p><p>“Uh..yeah. Saw him speaking to Connor near his house earlier.” Fundy shrugged in a lackluster attempt to mask his embarrassment from being caught off guard, Punz letting out a snicker that made Fundy duck his head reflexively.</p><p> </p><p>“Thanks, Fundy. Punz, watch out for him, alright?” Tubbo joked in a successful attempt at lightening the atmosphere, Punz's snickers turning into laughter as Fundy sputtered out baseless insults.</p><p> </p><p>With a greater sense of pep in his step, Tubbo made his way onto the Prime Path towards Tommy's house. The farther he walked from the nerve-filled chatter of the L’manburg residents towards the quiet of the SMP made him all too aware of the weight that the conversation he and Tommy were going to have. It’s been<em> months </em>since Tommy’s initial exile, and so many things were said and weren’t done between them that Tubbo has no doubt won’t be easily fixed.</p><p> </p><p>Reaching the top of the towering oak wood staircase that led to Tommy’s house, Tubbo didn’t know if he felt gratefulness or dread in the realization Tommy was alone, seemingly frantically looking through the chests in his home. No stalling anymore. This is it.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy seemed to ignore Tubbo’s fast approaching steps towards him as he ran downstairs, the sound of multiple chests quickly being yanked open and slammed close glaringly apparent. </p><p> </p><p>Tubbo waited at the entrance of Tommy’s dirt hut. “What’re you looking for?” Tubbo asked. </p><p> </p><p>Tommy didn’t even look up. “Book. To-do list.” He muttered, distracted. A chest opened. A beat. The chest was gently shut, Tommy letting out a sigh as he sunk to the floor in what Tubbo can only guess as pure relief, Tommy clutching the unknown book to his chest protectively.</p><p> </p><p>The silence stretched out for long enough to make Tubbo fidget nervously as Tommy caught his breath. “Can we talk?” Tubbo tried. Tommy’s eyes slowly looked up to meet Tubbo’s, a mix of emotions swirling through them. </p><p> </p><p>“I wrote this book back when it was me and Techno,” Tommy started abruptly. “It’s a to-do list.”</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo couldn’t help but feel irritation prick his skin at the irrelevancy of it all, but he forced it down. This was just Tommy being Tommy, he reasoned, before muttering a quick, “Yeah, you told me.”</p><p> </p><p>Tommy’s lips pressed into a firm line, like what he used to do when he’s trying to tell Tubbo something and he doesn’t get the deeper meaning. Tommy opens the slightly worn book, flips a few pages, and reads. “'Speak to Tubbo. It doesn’t matter if we get along or not.'” A pause. “'I just miss him.'” Tommy glances up and looks Tubbo in the eye with a sense of vulnerability that only was reserved for his best friend. “Why didn’t you ever visit?”</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo feels rooted to the oak path in shock at the bluntness of it all, but he pushes the bewilderment aside and goes for pure honesty. “I thought...I thought you hated me, Tommy. I was the one who exiled you, and whether or not it was the best decision for our country, I didn’t think you ever wanted to see me when I was the reason you were there."</p><p> </p><p>Tommy’s eyes were suddenly glassy. “I did want to see you. People visited, but I was alone.” He picks at his nails, a bad habit Tubbo remembers Tommy was fervently trying to break ages ago. Tommy glared at the ground, trying to will the tears away. “I wish you bit the bullet and visited anyway. I lost myself in Logst- that place. Dream made me fully believe that you wanted nothing to do with me ever again, and even now, I can’t get those words out of my head.”</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo slowly sunk down to meet Tommy’s level on the ground of his home. “I’m sorry, Tommy.” He says, meaning it with every bone in his body and then some. “If there’s anything I can do to—”</p><p> </p><p>“There really isn’t.”</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo’s breath catches in his throat. </p><p> </p><p>Tommy swallows, seemingly pushing himself to talk. “Look, I’m the last one to want to admit this shit, but the fucking damage has been done. What matters now is protecting L’manburg. I don’t need pity from my best friend.”</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo feels the overwhelming need to interject. “It’s not pity. It’s never pity with you, Tommy.” He gains the courage to look Tommy directly in the eye and ask his own questions. “What happened to us together against Dream? Why was it only just about you and the discs? What about me?”</p><p> </p><p>Tommy looks, unsurprisingly, affronted.  “Yeah, why wasn’t it just us together against Dream, huh?” He scoffs, his attempt at starting another shouting match between them falling flat as Tubbo just stares. Tommy stares back.</p><p> </p><p>Silence.</p><p> </p><p>“I was lying when I said the discs were more important than you, by the way. The moment I said it, I felt like shit, so that’s how I know.” Tommy says quietly.</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo’s eyes soften, albeit only a little. “Okay.” </p><p> </p><p>Tommy fidgeted with the ragged bandana around his neck. “I’m sorry. Genuinely.” He murmured, raising his gaze to the ceiling. “I know neither of us had it easy.” Tubbo hums in acknowledgment.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy blinks a few times, and pushes himself up, dusting off the dirt clinging to his pants. He stretches out a hand for his spy on the inside, his partner in crime, his best friend in the world. His Tubbo.</p><p> </p><p>“There’s still a lot of stuff we need to talk about,” Tubbo remarks, looking at Tommy’s calloused hand hovering in front of him.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy huffs, looking away. “Yeah, no shit. Get up, Mister President.”</p><p> </p><p>Tubbo winces at the title, but takes Tommy’s hand and lets himself be helped up, letting out a small gasp as Tommy brings him in a suffocating hug. It’s a little hard to breathe, but both of them know that this hug might be their last. Tommy’s shaking a little, and Tubbo would be lying if he wasn’t shaking all the same, but that’s for only the two to know.</p><p> </p><p>“No matter what happens out there today, I’m on your side, Tubbo.” Tommy sniffles.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, you too, Tommy. Us against Dream. Always.” Tubbo smiles into Tommy’s shoulder, neither of them wanting to let go.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy does it anyway, rubbing his eyes on his sleeve, and wordlessly motions Tubbo to follow until the two were sat at their bench.</p><p> </p><p>“Wait right there, Tubbo.” Tommy says, rushing to his house. Tubbo closes his eyes, hears the opening and closing of an ender chest, and then the soft lull of Chirp fading into existence.</p><p> </p><p>“This is your favorite music disc, isn’t it?” Tommy asks softly. Tubbo can feel Tommy’s eyes trained on him, probably worried but too proud to voice it aloud.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah,” Tubbo murmurs softly. He opens his eyes and looks on at his partner in crime, his forever vice president, his Tommy.</p><p> </p><p>Tommy grins, and the sun shines bright.</p><p>
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  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i banged this one out in preparation for the primal fear i have for tomorrow. here's some tubbo and tommy Finally Communicating because god knows they need to have a damn conversation to talk their issues out at least once</p></blockquote></div></div>
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